The End of the Wasp Season

I was hanging out at the pool with Joseph and Eli last Sunday and I saw someone reading a book titled...

The End of the Wasp Season

I had no idea what the book was about, but the title of the book felt like a slap in the face. It brought back many of the emotions and grief of my father's death a year ago. I can't believe it has been a year since he was stung by that wasp. I haven't written about it very much, but I think now is the time...

On the first day of the 2011-2012 school year, I was sitting in my classroom frantically working on my schedule when I got a phone call...my dad had been stung by a wasp...one wasp...on his finger. He went into anaphylactic shock and the EMS was trying to revive him. He had just enjoyed lunch at his favorite Mexican restaurant with his sister and was at her house for the afternoon. He reached down to pick up a flower pot...that's when he was stung. He said something like, "Damn it, I've been stung." Due to his history of severe allergic reactions to stings, my aunt turned to get her keys to head straight to the hospital, but within seconds he was on the floor and had stopped breathing.

He went approximately 50 minutes with no oxygen to his brain. The doctors were able to restart his heart, but we knew the situation was serious. Our family still had lots of hope, because he had already overcome a massive stroke just a few years earlier...we were told he wouldn't survive that stroke and if he did he would never be able to talk or feed himself or remember any of us...but he proved them all wrong. This time it was very different though...several tests showed that he had no brain activity and his organs were beginning to shut down. We quickly realized that he was already gone...only the machines and medicines were keeping his heart pumping.

Two short days later, my dad's close family stood by while the machines were stopped. I didn't know what to expect...even though the doctors and nurses had prepared us as best as they could. It was all over rather quickly...he was gone. Even though I didn't have a very close relationship with my dad, I loved him very much and it was hard losing him so suddenly. I worried about my aunt who was with him when he was stung...she blamed herself even though there was nothing that could have been done...the doctors said an epi pen wouldn't have saved him because the reaction was so severe. The EMS hit him 6 times with epi and he didn't respond at all. I worried about my sister who was so close to my dad...I knew it would be extremely hard on her, but she has done a great job managing her grief this year.

The next few days went by in a blur...and I was overwhelmed by the outpouring of support from everyone...my sister-in-law kept Eli, a friend brought dinner to the hospital, another friend picked up Joseph from school, etc, etc, etc. I feel like I never properly thanked all of the people who loved us, prayed for us, and supported us through that time of grief. If you are reading this, please accept my apology for not appropriately thanking you...I love you all so much!

With All My Love,
Dana

Aren't you embarrassed?!

Someone recently asked me, "Aren't you embarrassed to post those before/after pictures of your house online?"

I've reflected on that question for a few days and my answer is...yes and no.

I am ashamed that my house got to that level of disorder and chaos. I am sure I will soon be posting lots of my reflections about things that I've learned along this journey; however....

I am not too embarrassed to post the before pictures, because I see it as no different than people posting before/after weight loss pictures. These pictures help me to see how far I have come and they hold me accountable...they remind me that I don't want to go back to that point of utter despair and humiliation.

I also hope that these pictures will help other people who may be in similar situations. It took me years to finally allow someone to come into my home and help me. I was too embarrassed to ask my close friends that I frequently spend time with. I finally asked a friend that I see twice a year at a local consignment sale to come help me. As I stood at the door of the first room we decluttered, I was basically paralyzed. I didn't know where to start...it was too overwhelming. I had started working in that room before and quickly gave up....I needed someone like my friend, Geri, to come in and basically take over. I am now motivated to tackle more areas of my house on my own.

I challenge anyone who is feeling lost or overwhelmed with clutter to find a nonjudgemental friend to come and at least help you get started. I feel so much happier...and I don't have that tight feeling in my chest every morning when I wake up.

There is still A LOT of work to be done, but I am now motivated to continue making progress! Thank you all for your encouragement, prayers, and support! Now I need to get up from this computer and keep working....

Happy Birthday to My Sister

Just wanted to take the opportunity to say 

"Happy Birthday" to my sister, Jessica! 

Love ya!

These pictures were taken at her wedding...it was a beautiful day!

Don't Look in the Bags!

My awesome friend, Geri, came today and helped me make more progress in the dungeon basement! She even brought her 2 daughters who had no idea what they were in for...we started in my "office." During all of the cleaning and sorting, I saw Geri filling trash bags with stuff...there ended up being 6 trash bags! I was tempted to open all of the bags and "make sure" that I didn't need the stuff in the bags, but after talking to some other friends...they made me promise that I would NOT look in the bags! :)

 There's still a lot of work to do, but....WOW! I can't believe we made this much progress!!

Next, we moved into Eli's room...we got 2 bags of trash out of this room. Eli was so surprised when he got home tonight!!

 Once again, Sydney was SO HAPPY to have space to roll around!! :)

Apparently, two of my best friends had their feelings hurt because they have never seen my basement...well, I am sure Geri wouldn't mind having their help when we move on to the next part of the basement!! LOL

Revolve

Are you still going to the Summit?

Did you join Ridgecrest?

Where is your family going to church now?

Why did you leave the Summit?

These are just a few of the questions we've been asked over the past year. I've been wanting to write a blog post about our journey, but I wasn't exactly sure how to answer all of those questions...I honestly didn't know the answers to some of the questions. 

Since 2001, as active members of Homestead Heights Baptist Church (which became the Summit Church), Jarrod and I were involved in lots of different ministries. The Summit Church has been a huge part of our lives...through our infertility journey, pregnancy loss, and the birth of our two sons. Unfortunately, at some point we became disconnected. This sometimes happens as churches grow, but we do not blame the church. We had every opportunity to get involved with small groups, but as Jarrod's work schedule constantly changed and eventually led him to Maryland, we made excuses why we just couldn't get more involved. Eventually we simply stopped going to church. 

Months passed and I knew we needed to make a decision....find a way to get involved at the Summit again or find another church to join.  Our boys were already involved in the awesome Children's Ministry at Ridgecrest Baptist Church...they had attended Awana and VBS there for a couple years. I knew lots of people there and had been invited to Ladies Craft Night and other events. So, Jarrod and I started going to Ridgecrest and joined an awesome Sunday School Class. We finally felt connected again....but I was not ready to join. I was still feeling pulled to something different.

My awesome coworker, Brunell Moody, had been keeping me updated on the new church her son and daughter-in-law were launching. I had dinner with them one night and they explained their vision for Revolve Church. I told them that I would pray for their church, but I couldn't get involved because we were just becoming active at Ridgecrest. Over the next few months, God kept placing Revolve Church on my heart. Our Sunday School class began a time of transition with our leaders leaving and I felt that it was time for us to make a commitment to Revolve Church. From the time I made that commitment to join their launch team, I became excited about church again....I don't mean that to sound negative toward the Summit or Ridgecrest....both of those churches are doing awesome things for Durham (and the world!!) I am just excited to be a part of something new...helping something start from the ground up.

If you are curious about Revolve Church, please come out to Frankie's Fun Park on Thursday, June 21st at 6:00pm. You will learn more about the mission of the church and there is no obligation to get involved! Please join us for dinner and a FUN night learning more about how God is building this church to impact Durham. Feel free to ask me any other questions....you can leave a comment here or email me at walkerfamily94@gmail.com. 

Progress

I had an awesome, brave friend come help me in my downstairs family room/junk room today! I joked and told her that I was going to make her sign a confidentiality agreement so she couldn't tell anyone how bad it was. For some insane reason, I decided to post evidence online. Joseph was home today and helped us, too.

 It's like "Where's Waldo?" Where's Joseph?!

 I still need to go through a few boxes of toys. Thankfully the consignment sale is coming up soon!!

Sydney was so excited! She actually had room to roll around on the carpet...now I need to vacuum again!!

Funny Kids

Just wanted to quickly post a few funny quotes from my boys before I forget them...

Eli saw me stepping on the digital scale. He came in an stepped on it, too. He said, "Mommy, you're the winner! That's a lot of points!!" Thanks, kid.

Joseph has been asking to have a yard sale for a LONG time, so we had a small one on Saturday. On Friday night he was helping me make signs. He wasn't taking his time coloring in the letters....I told him to slow down and stay in the lines. He said, "But Mommy, we want it to look like a kid colored it so more people will come to the yard sale."

I couldn't believe the number of people who told me what a good salesperson Joseph is....he actually talked several people into buying things that they weren't even looking at.

Eli also got excited and started bringing some of his toys outside to sell. After selling one of his toys the customer handed him the money. I told him to go put it in the money box and he said, "No, Mommy these are MY bucks."

That's all I can think of for now...I'm sure I'll remember more things later! These boys definitely keep me entertained!